心有向暖,筑爱成巢

一 我对外界应接不暇的变化时常呈现一种毫无意义的抵抗姿态,生活似乎并不对我产生怜惜之情,依然按自己的节奏行进,这让我感到无奈。 街上,车辆和行人,继续像早上一样喧嚣沸腾,滚滚向前。嘈杂和凌乱,如同跌落羽翼的蝴蝶,在城市狭长拥堵的街道,徒然挣扎,直到溃败,归于沉沦。 有人说,最好的爱情是在他的世界里沉沦与堕 落,就像赵四小姐的爱情沉沦在张学良将军的生命里,就像杨过的爱情沉沦在小龙女绝世的清纯善美里。经过那么久的日月了,你有没有一点点,沉沦或堕落于我的温情暖意里?于我,并不希望你为我的喜好而让自己受到委屈。但心底里还是愿意接受你主动向着我的方向靠拢。只要你愿意,我自是欢喜。同样的,你也不会希望,我为你自由奔走式的生活方式而彻底放弃自己。我们两个,一直以来,就是这样以天空和大地的形式,相望和相守。存在和需要。呵呵,我们是天地合美喽。 蓝天和大地的爱情何等壮美凄绝!两个相爱的人遥遥相对,永无相聚的时刻,他们的爱情是人世间最美的画卷。所以,有人说 天长地久 。谁能说,不相聚便不相知,不想见便不相惜?蓝天和大地的爱情,春有微风低语,夏有骤雨倾唱,秋来百花传情,冬有飘雪舞蹈,这些都是他们爱情最华美的乐章,只是,很多人不懂而已,他们习惯于一切具体的伸手可触的真实。 就像那天,同学聚会,大家为我不平,骂你太狠心肠!我笑笑替你解释。他们不懂,咱不怪人家。 昨晚,你打来电话,述说正在从西藏飞往广西南宁的中转站 重庆,等待转机。我感到惊讶,短短几天,西藏的气候还没适应过来,又回广西干嘛?你说,这次行程来去总共只有三天时间,在重庆转机时,你利用空隙去两路公园拍了几张照片,发给我看看。听你这样说,我良久无语。 那里你还记得! 很多年以前,我曾去过,那时你没时间陪我,我一个人在陌生的城市,行走在山清水秀的两路公园里等你,等你,一等就是一整天,公园里每一条小路,每一座小桥,每一丛花草都留下了我的足迹。我不敢到别的什么地方去,因为全无方向感,害怕迷路给你添麻烦,而那时候,我还是你,都不能安心打的代步。这么多年,你还记得件事。觉得有所欠缺么?那是我今生第一次一个人出远门,从北京到重庆几千里的路程,坐了火车的硬座,一路奔你而去,见到你的时候,整个人都散了架子,而你却没时间陪我,哪怕一个上午也好。我在公园里独自走了四天的时间,又独自回家。决定和你在一起以后,而我,好像一直没来得及真的和你计较。 时常会问,在我们之间到底有没有爱情?你爱我多一点,还是我爱你多一点?这样的问题,你从不明确回答,只说,我们两个是在合适的时间遇到的最适合在一起的人。我说,总是我利用假期去看望你,那么,是我爱的多一点。我这样说,你却不肯承认,说自己要是有假期也会和我一样,有晚上的交通工具决不等到天亮。那好,就算你爱得多一点吧,我不和你计较。 也真是。换做我,像这三天紧张的行程,会抓紧每一刻时间躺在宾馆舒适的房间休息,绝不会跑去公园拍什么照片,只为发给我看看,那个曾经让我像只流浪猫一样到处溜达的公园如今是个什么样子?这样的傻事只有你才会去做。我说,你傻。你一直以为我是开玩笑呢,原来是真的傻。傻不傻呀?我说。眼睛里却腾起一层潮湿。原来,你无论走到哪里,我依然在你心里呢。我又自作多情的感动了。 照片发过来了。好像,那里的小桥显得瘦了;好像,那条小路越发深了;好像,那座山顶显得肥了;好像,那棵桂花树显得壮了。 我把照片一一存起来,收在空间私人相册里,一个哪怕走到天涯海角都能被你看到的角落。只要我愿意,你随时可以进来。我的空间永远是你思乡时最近的家园。 二 我说自己是猫性的女子,深爱自己的一个人。冷了,乏了,累了,便执意要寻一个温暖地方儿。像极了小时候,奶奶养过得那只老猫,整个冬天做追逐阳光的孩子,从窗台到炕头再到鸡窝顶上,只要阳光懒照的地方都有她的身影。 昨天,家里的暖气炉子坏了,不能再修,换新的要再等几天,店主说,要专程从广东运过来。屋子里没暖气,一个人舍不得开空调取暖,所以,好像屋子里比外边还要阴冷一些。这个周末儿子没回家,周五的晚上打来电话,说周末学校里组织学生集体去北大感受名校氛围。电话里儿子语气少有的淡漠,漫不经心的说起,自己这次考试得了一等奖,学校奖了一支很漂亮的钢笔,要留着给我用,下周就拿回来。呵呵。儿子在什么时候学会和你一样,就知道用这种让我心花怒放的小把戏哄我骄傲,各式各样的笔是我的最爱啊!我说,你送的那支我还没舍得用,他的就留着让他自己用。儿子遭受回绝似乎有点不情愿,笑说,别人的就收下,我送的嫌不好?我笑颜如蜜并不解释,好在电话里他也看不到我的喜形于色,被他看到一定觉得我太欠城府。儿子低低自语,说以后一定送一个比你那支好的给我。心中又是一阵窃喜,这孩子和你之间依然有微妙的关系呦。他是否在嫉妒你的那支金笔的分量,你的那支可是在山西太旧建设中三等功臣的奖品呢!其实,只要是你俩送的于我来说,都是珍宝。我窃喜,不单单是他离开我以后更加懂事,而是他小小年纪却懂得低调,含蓄,勤勉,质朴,得意时不张扬,低迷时不气馁。嗯,比较满意,是我所期望看到的。他是我们两个人的军功章呢。也是你今生最美丽的荣誉。他是你和我之间季节轮回里最美的和弦,他是你和我生命年轮里铭刻的春风骤雨和飘雪,他是今生今世我和你等待在遥远距离之外唯一的心灵驿站。为此,我每时每刻都愿意把他佩戴在生命最显赫的位置上。心里。眼里。笑容了。 现在我每天都关注小城天气变化了。近来将连续出现雾霾天气,天气预报提醒人们尽量减少外出活动。每天去上班都见到这样的情景:行人种种,无论天空是否阳光暖照,都对着自己采取重要防护措施,口罩、防毒面具频繁登场,遮掩的神秘令人感觉不安。这个有着几十万人口的小城,通往北京的高速路据说今年十月就要开通,听说首都机场要搬出来在附近修建,房价一夜之间从原来的四千多猛涨道六七千。街上行人车辆突然从地底下冒出来一样,多到稠密。去年秋后,政府下大力度扩建了城市主要交通干线,把绿化带拆除了,这样,整个城市里几乎看不到一棵树了。冬天还好,如果夏天一到,我们每天上班下班,路上一点绿色的阴凉也没有了,我们是否要变成烤红薯了?受城市变化影响,我将调整生活长远规划,暂且放下贷款购房打算,房价再怎么猛涨也将与我无关,我对缺少树木花草的城市充满抵触情绪。这样你也可以安心工作,不必为贷款买房而费心思了。 下午三点多钟,从家里走出来。走到街上时,对着天空看了看,太阳已经被错落有别的楼体挡在城市外边了。 太阳仿佛并不甘心,一心想要穿透厚重的遮挡,钻进城市腹地里来。按说城市也是阳光的家园,从什么时候,水泥丛林将她拒之门外?她再不能坦荡荡穿行在城市的每个角落。阳光是坚韧的行者,她似乎并不为此气馁,今天,她一改自己的秉性,执意做个怕羞的女孩儿,掩了半边颜面,只露一块窄窄的额头和眉眼,在墙角,在极高的天上,依然笑颜如花。一朵含蓄的吝啬绽放的花。 我先是站在院子里,仰着头,对着天幕收拢了一下目光,然后,才放目远方。天幕上灰暗的像抹了一层蜡染,又像写意画的底色,晕染了整张纸面。天空,一轮月亮半圆,像被打磨的几近透明的玉片,若隐若现的挂在天上。月亮和太阳在这样的季节里,是宇宙门前两盏遥遥相对的灯笼,一个灿烂温暖,一个冰清玉洁。天空因为有了她们的守护变得生动妩媚。如果是艳阳高照不会出现这样的景色吧? 我正翘首观望,老天念我,似心生怜惜,远处丝丝缕缕的云被风扯得越来越薄,只是一瞬便变得明亮起来。云如飞絮,淡蓝的底子越发显得干净。这正合我的心意,在这冬末春初春寒意未消的午后,一心想到外面的暖阳里去沐浴。 胃里还是肚子的什么地方,纠缠着无法言说的内乱。有病,从来都是舍到最后的时刻,如同:等待果子熟透,就让它挂在枝上,越是红的鲜艳,越是醒目。你说过,这样的想法是不好的,就像养虎为患。我说,最好是能病给你看,在你回来的时候。我的阴谋也是为了多一点关爱自己。 在一个街道的拐角,有大片的阳光,从敞开的高空跌落下来,没来得及完全稳妥飘落,便被楼角撕扯成碎片。一些洒楼房的阳台上,一些挂在楼顶,还有些细碎如絮的斑驳光影撒到地面上,几位老太拿着手里的马扎向这片光影的世界寻来。她们时而抬头望天,时而又瞅瞅脚下,终于各自捡了一片温暖披在身上,坐下去时,脸上有着满足的笑容,缓缓地舒展了无尽的话题。我不能和她们去争抢这一点的阳光,转身向城外走去。 城的最西边,有偌大的一个菜市场。小城里最开阔离家最近的一片地方。走到的时候,却也是四处高楼耸立迫使阳光不能顺畅抵达了,地面冰冷阴暗寒凉,太阳明亮的光焰只在远处的屋顶上跳跃,一片诱惑的光明只能遥遥祈望了。 不远处,又一片新开盘的小区正在筹建,吊车沉重的轰鸣,电锯尖锐的嘶叫,夹裹着烟尘的气息如隔世幽魂,诡异,隐晦。无处躲藏。 极目远眺,楼房与楼房的缝隙里,几点零星的树影,挣扎、生动、瑟缩、萎靡。一派唯恐性命攸关的模样儿。它们是我心底不尽的忧伤。这样的情绪从春天树木发芽,到冬日叶落枝寒,伴随着城里楼房的高度与日俱增起来,从未停止过。。 城市终于以一种坚硬挺拔的气势矗立在我们的生活当中,乡村渐行渐远。 现在,我只能通过不停的行走才能寻找到一片温暖的阳光。 三 我想要带着你私奔,在一个叫做 不知道 什么时候的时候 。 我是在走向野外的路上产生这个想法的,因为心底里欢快地唱起这句歌词,估计是我自己写的。突然就有了这样的想法。紧接着,嘴角立刻上扬,轻轻浮现一丝不易被人察觉的微笑。我被这念头鼓舞着蠢蠢欲动手舞足蹈,并加快脚步。只是,眼下实在有点冷,我需要阳光的温暖和照射。 工作之余,会特别强烈的想和一个小孩玩耍,他带给我的快乐无与伦比。比如,现在,一个人走在去野外的路上,去寻找阳光的时候。可是,他不愿这个时候出来陪我。他身体还有点娇弱,我也不想他吹了冷风感冒。 很多时候,一些事你就不能过多去想,一想成真啊! 尽管方式不是你想象中的那么美好。这不,在经过一个下午寻找阳光的行走之后,我又一次为他的到来提供了机会。好像我并没有期待以这样一种方式见到他,但还是对他的到来表现出满心的欢喜。 晚上回来,似乎也没有吃任何危险性的东西,或许,只是因为整个下午寻阳光不见,吹了一肚子冷风的缘故,第二天,早上起床到中午,几个小时的时间都在重复一件事,不间断的 跑去厕所。一趟紧连着一趟。嘴里的的白开水还来不及滋润喉舌,下边已经有了便感。仿佛,胃和肛门之间从来没有一根细长的通道。 有些担心,怕自己不能独立完成从家到医院的行走。电话来弟弟帮忙。如此情形他颇感意外恐慌,竟说,打120吧。他这样说怕是乱了方寸。他是四个轮子的汽车跑来的。 他是在任何时候都能笑的出来的人,这时的担忧却写在脸上。还好,他想到了大姐 我的一个朋友,并自作主张打通了电话。有大姐在,弟弟心里开始轻松活泛,幽默风趣笑话不断,我只得抱紧肚子,并严重声明:不许再让我笑了,会大小便失禁的!他们两个带我去医院急诊,医生开了长长的药方。 冰冷的液体顺着血管流进胳膊里,从中午一直到晚上。五瓶液体源源不断的注入血管,冰冷彻骨,心底发寒。却想:那些并不怎么宽敞的管道,一下子流入这么多液体,会不会像洪水泛滥成灾,冲毁我的堤岸,而我要溃不成军!?把想法说给大姐听,大姐淡然而笑。 弟弟忙着赶去公司,电话叫来小侄子和他的妈妈。小侄子不到两周,还睡着,不知是半路上睡着了,还是他妈妈把他的梦乡直接转移过来。心里愧疚羞惭,很不过意。大姐自责:说是自己疏忽,忘了告诉弟弟,她已经跟单位请假了,可以在家关照我。 阔阔妈妈找来暖宝充电后压在输液器的管子上。身心渐渐回暖。 很多年了,病着,有人在身边还是第一次。 面容素淡,不露声色。 阔阔是我给小侄起的名字。只有我一个人叫。 我希望他的一生行走于天地之间,天做窗,地为床,山川树林做围墙,心胸坦荡,沐浴阳光。 每次,我喊:阔 阔 ,他便一脸害羞,满屋子转来转去找,看他的样子我很开心。 他们全家叫他永昕,(永鑫)我从没问过是哪两个字,我对我不感兴趣的事不会深究。弟弟说,花钱起来的。我却还是觉得我起的名字好一些,于是,他们叫他们的,我就叫我的。 阔阔跑来跑去跟着帮忙,一刻也不消停。终于发现喷花的水壶也可以对着人喷,便欢天喜地的拿来喷大姐,喷妈妈。大姐躲起来,对着他关上阳台的门。他获得胜利的喜悦。他的妈妈一边躲闪,一边叮嘱他:去喷花。阔阔很听妈妈的话,跑去喷花。一颗高大的绿萝,我自己用了三年的时间养了起来,已经高达屋顶。也许,他觉得喷花一点也不好玩,花一点反应也没有,干脆跑来喷我。我安静地躺在床上,一点动静也没发出来,可是,他发现了我,并且认定我不做反抗。他对着我的脸猛喷,我只好用被子蒙了头,他开心激动哈哈大笑。地板上到处都是水渍的时候,他终于尽兴的摔了一跤。他的妈妈帮他狠狠的教训地面。眼泪还挂在脸上,便雨过天晴了。 大姐被他从阳台上拽出来时,又发现了更有趣的武器 晾衣服的杆子。于是,拿在手里对着大姐一通挥舞,大姐这次不再躲避,拿出输液的工具要给他打针,他吓坏了。转过来讨好大姐,对着床上我藏在被子底下的双腿胡乱敲打,我把腿缩上来,他只几下就把晾衣架子的脑袋打掉了一边。我见了,恐吓说,一定要他爸爸赔偿。他想一想,歪着脑袋一字一顿说, 我 修。 于是,蹲在地板上,用力把掉下来的枝杈安回去。大姐拿了一条胶布给他,缠了半天,手一挪开,便又掉了下来。大姐说,这下非得叫你爸爸陪姑姑一个新的。 他不服气,站起来,很用力地大声说, 长大 修。 他妈妈急忙过来帮他,笑呵呵说,听到了吧,我们长大了再修。我被他折磨得笑到强忍。两周零三个月的小古怪,这样多的诡计。 天气预报说,今天依然继续雾霾天气,连续阴转多云,气温将继续下降,提醒大家外出加衣御寒,预防感冒。 输了三天液,我的身体回复如初,小侄子和他妈妈还有大姐每天都过来陪我,屋子里人多,开一会儿空调,一点也不冷了。 病彻底好了,才打电话给你,不是把病情讲述给你听,希望你分享阔阔这小东西带给我的快乐,我尽力搜寻语言躲闪开输液的事,还是被你听了出来,从我依然虚弱的声音里。你显然有点恼怒了,质问我:大冷的天气干嘛要去野外?我呵呵笑着解释道:春天不是快到了吗?老燕很勤劳,捡枝衔叶好筑巢呀。 呵呵,你懂得。 赞 (散文编辑:江南风) 凤凰山春游

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林家巷 一次,我路过宜宾,因为转乘飞机需要在宜宾呆近5个小时,由于对这座城市不熟悉…

林家巷

林家巷 一次,我路过宜宾,因为转乘飞机需要在宜宾呆近5个小时,由于对这座城市不熟悉…

夏夜的迷茫

受不了暑热的我,来到渭水河道散步纳凉。咸阳湖美丽的南岸公园和自然的河道里,纳凉的…

爱情情故事

爱人去世,相爱的人…

Dear! I am waiting for you to go home.

Dear! These three words are a little strange in my mouth, but in my heart, we can all say them affectionately I am so eager, as if it was a matter of the last century, those warm atmosphere is gone, and your smiling face is fixed in my heart, not as cold as you are now. It rained outside the window. I have smoked three cigarettes on the balcony. Maybe it is helpless. In fact, it is really helpless. Smoke has become my best partner. I know you are always disgusted, when you are here, I always restrain myself from smoking. I condensed the words and concentrated them again, repressed my feelings and then suppressed them. I still couldn’t help falling tears. They all said that the man had tears and didn’t flick lightly. I was already standing on the edge of despair, dear, what exactly do you want? I struggled and worked hard to extend our love far away, but you didn’t have a smile, but you used quarrels to kill time, but you use sinking to defeat my desire to heal. It was late at night, but I didn’t know whether to pick you up or not. Maybe I couldn’t pick you up at all. Both children fell asleep and looked at their drooling faces. I knew I couldn’t bear it, I can’t bear this family. When we were young, youth seduced our arrogance like this. You nestled in my arms like a flower, looking forward to the future life. I have no house and no ability, there is no superior material life, but I swore secretly at that time that I would definitely give you the happiest life. We are so young, we fell into the garden of love, unexpectedly, you are pregnant, looking at your panic eyes, I made a decision, please marry me, no house, no wedding dress, you don’t have any complaints. We just hold hands like this. You have become my most beautiful bride. I am love you so much. I married me when I had nothing. My half-son took me to court for that house, I stood in the dock without knowing anything about the law. My heart was cold, while you were by my side, warming my sun. I made concessions, I took you and the child wandering, and you followed me so firmly. I thank you so much, because you have given me a lot of warmth and happiness. We snuggled together in the wind and rain of the world. I had no father for a long time, no support and no background. I had to rely on myself. I pursued my dream, but gave up my dream for life. My playful nature gradually disappeared. At the age of 20, I was mature like a wall. How much I wanted you and my children to lean against me, so I wanted to stand stronger. I work hard everywhere, just want you to live a stable life. Whenever I go home and give you that meager salary, I always sigh in my heart, but at the same time I am so satisfied, because you and the child are waiting for me. Today’s society is a society of the law of the jungle. Everyone values interests. It is not easy for a man to work hard in the society. He will be angry and looked down upon by others, dear, I have been holding on hard. I believe my thin shoulders can hold up the sky for you. No matter how hard I am, I bite my teeth. I am not willing to spend a penny randomly. I always think of your smiling face and children. Although the peaceful life is bitter, I feel very happy from my heart. I don’t smoke or drink. I always buy your favorite clothes and toys for you by saving money. Our second baby is here. This is the second gift from love. I know the burden on my shoulder is heavier, but watching you busy in the kitchen, watching the children crawling around my legs, I have no complaints. I just want to keep you and never separate for a lifetime. Finally, we have our own house. Although the house is small, it belongs to us. We no longer have to stand under other people’s eaves to watch the rain. Dear, I realized my first promise with actions, I gave you a home that really belongs to us. But your smile is less. I am so stupid that I didn’t care. I naively thought that you should be satisfied. A woman kept her caveolae and watched the children grow up day by day, how happy it is. I really thought you were a happy little woman. Under my umbrella, you opened the most beautiful flower. In order to live a better life, I choose to go out to work and go back to the dormitory after work. I always like to open my mobile phone to see you and the children on the screen protector. I always say: this is my wife, this is my child, dear, I will make you happier. But gradually, your phone number is less, your information is less, and finally there is no more. I was eager to wear it and looked at my mobile phone eagerly, looking forward to the news of you and your child in my heart. Sometimes I think that it is not easy for you to take two children alone, and it is enough for you to be busy. As long as you are safe, it is my greatest wish. But how I wish you could make a phone call or send a message to greet me and let me know that you have been caring about me. Every time you call home, you are always impatient, I can’t say a few words, you start to quarrel with me sharply, saying that I only know to earn money, not to care about my family, and that I am at leisure outside. But dear, you really don’t understand my sadness outside. I want to hear the voice of the child. How much I miss you, but you don’t know how happy my heart is when I hear the child shouting for my father! However, how helpless I am. I have to separate myself from you for the sake of life. No man likes to wander outside, but only men are the support of the family, only when we work hard can we support our family, can our beloved live a life of plenty of food and clothing, and can our children eat less and wear less like other children. When I returned to the local area and had a career of my own, I thought I could fall to the dust and compensate me for my debt to you and my children. I did everything at home, whatever you say, I promise, I will buy whatever you want, dear, I am always around you and your children, and I don’t want to be separated from you any more. However, I feel invisibly that you are getting farther and farther away from me, your smile is gone, you are complaining, you ignore my existence and call, and you leave the child to me day after day. When my career started, you couldn’t help me in the same boat. I understand, because I am man, when I sent everything to you, you became so indifferent. For so many years, I have always loved you, but I feel in my heart that you are already so strange. You don’t make breakfast for me any more. My dirty laundry is scattered by the bed and sent the children to school. Every time you find your mood is in a mess, dear, you have changed, you no longer care about what clothes I wear every day, what kind of food I eat, whether I am happy every day and whether I am tired from work. You only know how to ask for money and quarrel has become a common occurrence, the child’s eyes were already afraid of this battlefield full of war. The family I once tried my best to build had no happiness I wanted. The child is not wrong. After all, they are two children. Think about my life experience and the scene where my stepchild took me to court. I won’t fight cold, I can’t let my children go my way too. I don’t want them to lose either of their parents. They need their own biological parents. I am tired, but I don’t want to let go. Looking at the child, I shed tears again and again and drunk again and again. I am trying hard to persuade you that you are still the best. You said you had enough to stay at home and wanted to find a job to evacuate your mood. As long as you are happy, as long as you change your bad temper, I agreed. Unexpectedly, I regretted my decision. The outside world is too chaotic and there are many temptations. Dear, although you have a bad temper, you are simple. I am still afraid that you will be cheated or bullied, but you broke my heart with facts. You started to become irregular when you went to work. You either returned late or did not return all night. I am not a weak man. I want to exchange my life for your heart, but when I see two children, I am enduring, crying and bleeding. You have changed and become so strange, no longer a girl in my arms, no longer a girl in a pink dress. The thick makeup on your face hides your whole person. I almost can’t recognize you. You gave up your home, give up the child and the lover who worked hard for you. Children always ask me: Dad, Where Is Mom? Why don’t you play with us? Why don’t you go home for dinner? Don’t you want us? Did we do something wrong? Looking at the child’s pitiful face, my heart was broken. What else could I say? I hugged the child tightly, and I burst into tears. Dear, even if there is no love, I just said that even though, I still want to go with you, because the child is innocent, dear, have you ever thought about turning back? If you are cheated one day, what kind of attitude should you appear in front of me and my children, and what kind of attitude should I accept you. There are too many words to tell you. We have passed through several years of ups and downs together. I know I have made many mistakes, or I have neglected you because of my work, let you spend a lot of lonely days alone and fail to give you a luxurious life. What I have done is not good enough, but I have been working hard, I have always wanted to make you and your children happier. I have also tried my best to get rid of my bad temper. Dear, I am always silent because there are too many reluctant to give up. I don’t want to smoke any more. I can’t remember the number of cigarettes. Smoking can only relieve the temporary depression, but my heart can’t calm down. Tonight, I really want to pick you up from work and give you an umbrella, but I still haven’t moved. I’m afraid the scene before me when I see you will make me more heartbroken, I don’t want to expose any of your lies of coming back late or not. When I came to the child’s room, I just watched the child distracted and shed tears silently. Maybe I knew in my heart that I couldn’t pick up you at all, or you didn’t go to work at all. The perfume smell that frequently appeared on you is a brand that I can’t afford. Speaking of which, I think I am really useless; The alcohol on you always makes me vomit, I have prepared the food and it is already very cold. The children have eaten it. I am afraid that you dislike the leftovers and have already prepared a new one waiting for you. In fact, I know that it is the same as not done, you are not used to the food at home, just as you are tired of me. Dear, I am just a man with flesh and blood, love and hate. If there is no child, I believe I will make the choice of divorce without hesitation. Now facing you, I don’t know if my way will repeat itself on my child. I dare not think that I am so scared. My poor child is innocent and my heart hurts so much! Dear, what is your heart made of, how can you let the three hearts in your family break for you? At night, it was still so quiet, the rain was still so big, the lonely figure in front of the window, who knew that his heart had been broken and broken, and love and hate were so entangled, my dearest person! What should I do! Don’t you miss our past at all and the begging eyes of two children at all! I don’t want to be angry or entangled. I just want to have a good talk with you, talk about our past and our future. I know I can’t wait for you tonight. I wrote this letter with tears, because you have given me no time to talk. You are always at home and you are always impatient, you always quarrel with each other, dear, I hope you can calm down and finish it. No matter what kind of love, it will be gradually dull, relying on the management of two people, no matter how wonderful the outside world is, people still need to come back to reality. Life is like this. I don’t want much, as long as your heart and our warm home. If you are still determined to leave after reading this letter, if someone is worth giving up on us and can give you a happier home, then I will not stop you, fate is so bizarre, you can have a better life, my child and I will not retain. If you still love this family, you still feel that my shoulder is your support, and you still feel that the child is your pride, just look back, my child and I are still waiting for you, accompany you to the end of your life. ——– People who always love you

Zan (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) Phoenix Mountain Spring Tour

After dressing up at Meiko and changing into an organic glass button suit, the hour hand of the wall clock at home has pointed to nine o’clock. I cross it with noon…

Enter June

In the singing of summer cicada, in the intoxicating evening breeze of summer, we walked into June together again. Entering this memory, we…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

The confusion of summer night

I couldn’t stand the heat and came to Weishui River for a walk to enjoy the cool. In the beautiful South Bank Parklands of Xianyang Lake and the natural river, it is cool…

Love story

Lover dies, lover…

You are on the other end of the phone.

I can’t see your expression on the phone, happy, silent, serious, sad, I can’t touch it, because you are on the other side of the phone. The telephone facilitated us and pulled us away. It was really like a double-edged sword. We can’t help but enjoy it. I can gently call you and tell you that it will rain tomorrow, remember to bring an umbrella! The voice is full of sweet admiration, or softly said, I know you are busy, but you must pay attention to your body and take good care of yourself, but you don’t know that I can’t breathe in pain on the other end of the phone, you don’t know that after the rain of the first meeting, you are always in my heart. You don’t know what happened to me, you don’t know what I don’t want you to know, I don’t say you don’t ask, so you are always on the other side of the phone. I often look at the sky in a daze, in the misty morning, in the quiet afternoon, in the night of the night, or in the night when you are asleep, I think there must be a place where we have never arrived, and there must be all the expectations and yearns of our fantasy. It happens that if the radio station is playing a love song at this time, I miss whether it will be everywhere, but unfortunately you are still on the other side of the phone, and this phone may not be a lifeline at any time, especially this late night. It turns out that I am not your closest person, but the one you can miss at any time. I am so sad. What I am most afraid of is hearing such a sad story, just like a person sailing in the boundless ocean. There is no direction, no support, no way to dock, no way to let go! The phone rang. Obviously it was a few weeks later in the afternoon. It was sunny. I put my hand out of the window and felt the wind passing through my fingertips. It was soft and warm, as if the castle in my heart suddenly had the sunshine coming in, you talked, through the phone, through thousands of kilometers, your voice came, with a thin mist, still reach my heart, passing by the city you used to live in, suddenly I want to call you, want to know the food you used to like to eat, a house of call, the school you attended, what kind of mood makes you suddenly go to a strange place, a city where I have lived for many years, whether there is your yearning or all your worries. My giggle, you must not know how sweet and bitter my smile is. You are not only on the other side of the phone, but also on the other side of my heart, a few kilometers, Hundreds of kilometers, or thousands of kilometers, I can’t get there. Maybe if I didn’t meet you, I wouldn’t be so familiar with the city I live in now. I wouldn’t have thought of leaving when life was hard and there was nowhere to escape, because you are here, in the place where I live now, even if you only exist at the other end of the phone, even if I can only devour all my thoughts by myself. As a former host, I think there are some places suitable for two people to go. You and your beloved one, thank you. There is such a kind girl who finds you before me, I am lucky to accompany you through the future that I have no time to participate in. I will always send blessings to you at the other end of the phone for your happiness. The sunshine is still so dazzling and the sky is too blue and melancholy. We look up at homosky. I am in the city where you live, you are in the place where I live, and we are all on the other side of the phone!

Zan (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) Phoenix Mountain Spring Tour

After dressing up at Meiko and changing into an organic glass button suit, the hour hand of the wall clock at home has pointed to nine o’clock. I cross it with noon…

Enter June

In the singing of summer cicada, in the intoxicating evening breeze of summer, we walked into June together again. Entering this memory, we…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

The confusion of summer night

I couldn’t stand the heat and came to Weishui River for a walk to enjoy the cool. In the beautiful South Bank Parklands of Xianyang Lake and the natural river, it is cool…

Love story

Lover dies, lover…