Looking back, are you still there

Many years later, it was still the station and the crowds coming and going. I still stood in that position, but I was not accompanied by you. At the beginning, what I left was so safe and determined that I didn’t listen to anyone’s retention and persuasion and yearned for the colorful world outside. However, when I came to a strange city, the reality gave me a slap in the face, at the moment when I was homeless on the street for countless times, my tears and dignity disappeared. I began to miss you, miss home, and think of the city where I grew up, I thought about the beauty I had given up, and I wanted to cry again and again, because there was no one in the box of that big city who could calm down and listen to my home town story, no one cares about my thoughts. No one will ask me if I am homesick. What everyone cares about is whether you have money, where you work, and what degree you have. I began to become indifferent and indifferent, I began to use alcohol to kill my rest time, because only when I was drunk can I have the confidence to survive the loneliness that is the most difficult to survive. Finally, one day, I walked into the rental house scarred. Outside was the landlord knocking at the door quickly. Listening to the beating sound, I seemed to be crazy and depressed myself desperately, is such a big city really not a place for myself? I began to pack my luggage and set foot on my way home. I don’t know how to face the inquiries from my hometown, if someone asks me how I live outside? How can I answer calmly? If I say that I have a bad life, will someone laugh at me and say that as long as I leave here, I will definitely live better, what kind of mood do I have to go back now? Because I said I would live a better life, my parents held back tears and forced me to the train to complete my dream, because I said I would live a better life, dear, he said goodbye to me at the station with tears streaming down his face. My life is very bad now. Should I go back to find them? Will they welcome a loser home? Walking in the streets of my hometown, looking at the past neighbors, looking at those simple smiling faces, I am a little confused. Why do others have so easily the happiness and happiness they want to pursue for so many years. I came across a childhood playmate holding a boy over two years old. I summoned up the courage to come forward and say hello. I learned that she had been married for four years, and why did they dare to get married if she had no room, car or deposit, why are they not like those people in big cities saying: there is no chance to pursue happiness without money. Is that right? Is it? I kept offering discounts to others along the way. Along the way, the more I walked, the harder my head was. It seemed that I was more afraid of meeting more acquaintances, knight is afraid of meeting a person who wants to see and dare not see. Does that person live well? I am afraid that Yogueta will lead my wife and children to appear in front of me. How can I face it? How can I introduce myself and say that I used to live a better life in big cities, abandoned the first love that I had vowed to be together forever. The more I thought about it, the more sad I felt. I simply bowed my head and walked home quickly. I didn’t think what would happen when I came home. Back home, I still have to live, work, face everything I don’t want to face, pursue those dream things, and return to the cruel reality. I began to think and reflect. Can’t I achieve something if I stay in my hometown? Can’t I be happy if I stay in my hometown with him who is honest and honest? What did I get from my trauma after all these years of climbing and beating outside? The happiness I want is so simple. Why have I paid so much and it is so difficult to have it? Is it because I miss too much? I don’t know. I don’t know whether it is useful to regret now. I began to believe the words that the teacher said when I was in school: sometimes what you are looking for is actually by your side, it’s just that you didn’t find it, and you didn’t know it was what you always wanted until it was taken away by others, but it no longer belongs to you. Lying on my little bed, smelling sunny scent on the quilt, my mood was very steady. I was asking God, if I were given another chance, I would not choose to leave, I would wait in place again, I would not be confused, I will face it soberly. If I can go back to the past, if I turn back, will you wait for me again?

Zan (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) Phoenix Mountain Spring Tour

After dressing up at Meiko and changing into an organic glass button suit, the hour hand of the wall clock at home has pointed to nine o’clock. I cross it with noon…

Enter June

In the singing of summer cicada, in the intoxicating evening breeze of summer, we walked into June together again. Entering this memory, we…

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Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

The confusion of summer night

I couldn’t stand the heat and came to Weishui River for a walk to enjoy the cool. In the beautiful South Bank Parklands of Xianyang Lake and the natural river, it is cool…

Love story

Lover dies, lover…

True love is never far away

During the summer vacation in 1989, Hao Ran and Mei Er spent their time in a handicraft company that made tie-dye in Nanjing. The founder of the company is the teacher of Nanjing Art Institute. The couple are talented and smart in business, so the company is always busy. Mei Er and Haoran both worked in summer, so Haoran was arranged to iron clothes. Mei Er drew a model, and he also came to Haoran’s high school classmates, A group of young people are very happy while working. Mei Er didn’t say much, and he drew patterns one by one seriously. Although there were molds, he was afraid that the painting would be crooked and affect the finished products later. Haoran is different, with active nature and handsome sunshine. He also prefers a white body and a character like words and tuberculosis. No matter where he goes, there will be his laughter. All the people in the company have a good relationship with Haoran, but they don’t care about him. Perhaps I felt the indifference of my eyebrows, and Hao Ran always liked to provoke her. He would stand beside her like the wind when he took a nap, saying, eyebrow, have you finished? Without waiting for the eyebrow to answer, he raised his hand and stroked a few millimeters on the eyebrow’s face. He said loudly in his mouth: with the nose as the center, draw an arc ~ ~! The movement of drawing circles on the palm of the hand made people around him laugh. In the face of Haoran’s narrow eyebrows, he always said angrily: you hate it! Then turn around and ignore him. Who let himself grow a baby face? The eyebrows of the student era always cut the fairy tale head. Because of her quiet character, others always say that she is like a Japanese little girl. Eyebrow didn’t know her cute, and always felt that there was no flowing and fashionable shawl with long hair, so she preferred to stay at home to read books and play with small animals at home for shopping and dating. Eyebrow has two snow-white Persian cat, the eyes are sky blue, very beautiful, the name is also eyebrow, called Linda, Angel. The cat was sent by Haoran. He said that the eyebrow looks like a cat, just keep company with the cat, and the predecessor called her cat. Mei Er felt the kitten he sent, so he didn’t mind such a call very much. As the days passed, one day Wei came to Mei Er at noon and said: Tomorrow is My 20th birthday. We want to have a small party. Come on, everyone will go. Mei Er looked at Wei and said: I will definitely participate. Wei was an orphan. He was adopted from an early age. His parents who adopted him in high school died one after another, so Wei was a little introverted. But he has several good friends, and Haoran is one of them. The party was very lively. Wei and Haoran’s high school classmates went there, only eyebrow was several grades lower than them, because they had known each other for some time, so they were not embarrassed. The advantage of youth is that it is easy to accept friends without bad feelings, and the three-year-old eyebrows of young people naturally integrate into this group. After the activity, Haoran sent eyebrow home. He drank some wine and his face was a little red, but he was quiet. Haoran said: I have drunk too much. You can accompany me to go. I can take you to wrestling by bike. Don’t you want to fall? Then I looked at my eyebrows with strange eyes. There were very few words on the way back that night. When he reached half of the way, he suddenly said to Mei Er: Wei wants to chase you. I said that you have to go to school when you are young and refused. Eyebrow responded,: O. For many years afterwards, Mei Er never talked about the feeling of that night to Haoran. When Haoran was silent, his eyebrows were a little nervous and even scared. Haoran is not a bad person, nor will he hurt his eyebrows. Why is he nervous? She couldn’t figure it out. At the end of the party, Haoran disappeared for more than a week. Mei Er even thought that he would not come to the company again. However, in a quiet afternoon break, Hao Ran appeared in front of Mei Er. He woke up his nap eyebrow, handed over a few movie tickets and said: I have made a few of them. You can go to see them with your family or friends. Thank you. I don’t like watching movies very much… Take it. Haoran said and left in a hurry, leaving his eyebrows with an ignorant face. Mei Er still didn’t go to the movie, because she didn’t dare to walk alone at night, and her mother was also strict in control, so she was destined to let the mighty mind fall through. Mother was at ease with Haoran, but in her heart, eyebrows and Haoran were still children. When I arrived at the company the next morning, everyone was discussing the plot of the movie the day before. Looking at their heated discussion, Mei Er knew that it should be a good movie. Hao Ran quietly came to eyebrow and asked softly: Why didn’t you see yesterday? Is the movie good? I have something to do temporarily, so I showed it to my neighbor. Said eyebrow flustered. Haoran’s disappointment was piled on his face. His eyebrows wanted to comfort him, but they didn’t know what to say, so they had to follow him. Some people told Mei Er that the movie tickets that day almost spent all the pocket money of Haoran. Mei Er realized his heart and smiled loudly and foolishly. He followed Haoran and disappeared again. A few days later, he knew he was on a business trip with the boss. He was transferred to the sales department because he was shocked when ironing things. At that time, he was thrown out very far, all of which said that the iron was leaking electricity, haoran, who had been dumped, was promoted because of the blessing in disguise. The boss and wife like Haoran very much and think he is suitable for sales, because he opened up many sales channels for the company soon after entering the sales department. As a student who has not entered the Society, haoran’s ability cannot be underestimated. From then on, Haoran often went home from work to work with Mei Er, but sent a paragraph by the way not to Mei Er’s home. Mei Er was no longer indifferent to Hao Ran. She felt that no matter what fate she had, some people should always be kind to themselves, so their friendship has been extended. Haoran also loves reading books, but what he reads is not like eyebrows. Mei Er likes to read novels and poems, while Hao Ran likes to read military affairs and biographies of historical figures. However, this does not affect the communication between the two people. They will talk to each other about the contents they read and their feelings. After a long time, they will also look at the books they are interested in. Haoran never said anything about love or admiration to Mei Er, but he was always around like a big brother. Mei Er was not sure whether Haoran loved her or liked her, I just think Haoran is a trustworthy friend and a brother who can rely on. Haoran is several years older than Mei Er, so he took part in work several years earlier than Mei Er. After work, he worked very hard and became the backbone manager of the unit in a year or two. He was busy with social activities and seldom looked at eyebrows. Mei Er still read quietly, went to school, and kept company with small animals in his spare time. Until one day, Mei Er saw Hao Ran and his girlfriend outside the car window on the bus after school, A beautiful girl with long hair and waist. The bright blue shirt and white pants match her very well. The girl holds a paper box in her hand. It should be a gift bought by Haoran, my eyebrows thought. After a short psychological struggle, eyebrows were relieved. Since there was no fate of love, it was not bad to be a good friend, she thought. Long after working, Mei Er accepted the boy introduced by her neighbor’s sister under the urging of her mother. An ordinary and ordinary person with some bad habits, Haoran saw her when he came to see her eyebrows. When he was surprised, he said sadly to her eyebrows: This boy is not suitable for you, eyebrow, he is not suitable for you, you will become vulgar with him. Eyebrow said stubbornly: you don’t understand, how do you know? You will regret it. I will wait for you to tell me, then don’t cry to me! He left angrily. Mei Er finally failed to get together with that boy. Her boyfriend worked abroad all the year round and saw twice a year. The distance would dilute many uncertain emotions, what’s more, there is no basic relationship with eyebrows. In about two years, the relationship ended with a boy cheating. When Mei Er was wronged and depressed, he dialed Haoran’s mobile phone: Haoran, that chop suey had another girlfriend… Ha ha ha! You didn’t listen to me and were dumped by such rubbish. What a shame? Don’t be sad, he is not worth it. I’ll be back in a few days to take you on a trip. Eyebrow seemed to hear that Haoran, who hung up the phone, was still laughing, and suddenly his lung burst: this damn guy! When you come back, you have to fight! Since then, Haoran has called eyebrows every day, sometimes several times a day, which is nothing more than asking eyebrows about their work and life, and also calling eyebrows and cats as before, and I can learn the cat’s cry, making my eyebrows giggle. After a long time, eyebrows no longer struggle with lovelorn sadness. It seems inaccurate to say sadness, because it is not very painful. It should be psychological imbalance, because the two places are separated for a long time and there is no deep affection with that boy, so it is not difficult to get out of that haze. Haoran didn’t break his promise. After a week, he came to eyebrow’s side and traveled around with his eyebrows. When he couldn’t walk away from work, he would make an appointment with his eyebrows at which side to meet, I also took her on a business trip. Until one day, my eyebrows smiled at Haoran easily and said: Thank you Haoran. You are my oxygen setup. Every time I lack oxygen, you will save me. Haoran smiled at the Sunshine and said gently to his eyebrow: as long as you are happy, let me do anything. After that, I gently squeezed it on my eyebrow’s forehead. On the autumn night, Mei Er and Hao Ran walked along the quiet streets of Beijing. She stared at her warm and focused face at the dim lights. At this time, she finally understood that true love didn’t have to be far away, because Haoran never stayed away. Later, when Mei Er asked about the girl with long hair she had seen at the beginning, she burst out laughing: That Girl is a colleague who sent samples with me, little fool, ha ha!!

Zan (prose editor: dripping ink into injury) Phoenix mountain spring outing

After dressing up at Meiko and changing into an organic glass button suit, the hour hand of the wall clock at home has pointed to nine o’clock. I cross it with noon…

Enter June

In the singing of summer cicada, in the intoxicating evening breeze of summer, we walked into June together again. Entering this memory, we…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

Linjia Lane

Once in Linjia Lane, I passed by Yibin, because I needed to stay in Yibin for nearly 5 hours to transfer to a plane, because I was not familiar with this city…

The confusion of summer night

I couldn’t stand the heat and came to Weishui River for a walk to enjoy the cool. In the beautiful South Bank Parklands of Xianyang Lake and the natural river, it is cool…

Love story

Lover dies, lover…