Jiang Feng’s prose poems

At the age of 21, I was in full bloom like all the girls sinus. However, my sinus is open to a man older than my father. I don’t know what others think of me. As far as I am concerned, I am also unwilling. I opened my bright buds to him willingly. However, he just kissed my exposed fragrance reluctantly. He seemed to be just an expert in appreciating flowers. He never touched me with his hands, which laid bright and stunning roses to him. I love him, I hate him, and there seems to be no enough reason. I think, why do I know an old man like him instead of the Prince Charming I imagined? Is fate deliberately playing tricks on me? Am I destined to have an interesting story with him? I think there should be a break between his relationship with him; In a word, no matter what kind of man I will marry in the future, there is a little I am undeniable, my heart was once occupied by him for a long time, for a long time, I met bad men who hated in the wind series and always stared at every girl who was full of youth, flowing in spring, plump and beautiful like bee. How easy it is to get rid of them! I am also at the age when bee is eyeing me. Bee are like a sharp arrow. They hold the money in their left hand that makes every woman feel tempted; They hold the beautiful things that every woman has to love with in their right hand, they are like ascaris worms, and they understand the fragile nerves of every woman. I am a girl with more curiosity than ordinary women, so I am more sensitive to everything than others. Because I am like a boy, I never fear anything. My curiosity is almost beyond my age. In the first year of junior high school, I boldly squeezed into the gangster circle in the school. I clearly knew it was very dangerous, but I had no scruples at all. Most of the people who mix in the circle are poor in family, bullied by others and capable of living here. But I live in a rich family. I have been bold since I was young, and no one dares to bully me. I am not short of material and money. I don’t know how many times better than them, but I am just unconvinced. Maybe I really want to know the life in the circle, so I still squeezed into their ranks with my own beauty. My middle school life is colorful, and my parents don’t know these situations. I have always been an obedient child in their hearts. They have their life and I have my own way of living; when I grew up, the relationship between my parents and I became a kind of approximate relationship. My concern was expressed on my lips. What were my thoughts? Only you can know. After living in the circle for half a year, I realized that being a gangster has no dignity. For example, beating people, swearing, swearing, mixing men and women, deliberately causing trouble and playing hooligans, you must do everything. I finally squeezed in, because I was very beautiful, and I soon became their boss in the circle. From junior high school to senior high school, I have always been a domineering girl. When I was admitted to normal school, when I graduated from Normal School and integrated into the society, I suddenly found that I thought I could do anything at this time was nothing. My skill is useless at all; The University of society needs not only beautiful, overbearing, but also real talents. Facing many talented people in the social university, I am no longer lofty and naive at last. My father was a businessman. He opened a jewelry firm that was expensive and enjoyed exclusively for the rich in the crowded downtown of Fenhe River. My father seemed to understand all the rich people’s thoughts. He is not a psychologist, but he has a sharper eye than a psychologist. His nature is furious, but he is as quiet as a big girl when he starts a business. In fact, I am very annoyed with him at home. As soon as he comes home, he feels like shaking the earth. But I haven’t seen him for a long time and I miss him very much. This is me. What is father thinking? How does he want to earn money from the rich? In my impression, the more rich people, the more they regard money as more important than life, just like my mother. Is their money easy to earn? What suspension is there? My father is actually a very sunny man in my heart. He is tall, masculine and gentle in face. His eyebrows and eyes are very attractive to women. He is a very smooth hurtful person. Because he has great talent in business, he is more likely to coax people. Therefore, there is always a constant stream of people in his jewelry store. I often secretly observed my father’s speech, and he always stared at his big eyes that fascinated all women. He talked and laughed freely, sometimes with the domineering of masculine men, and sometimes with the hypocritical shyness inherent in beautiful women. Each of his actions intentionally and unintentionally induced greedy people to buy his jewelry. Every move he made was tempting the greedy person’s heart to go. In my heart, he deserved to be a stunning hurtful person. In my impression, the more rich people care about it, the more stingy they are when buying things, which makes all the poor people incomprehensible. Rich people are very hypocritical and live unreal, but they pretend not to care about what they want. Most of them are extravagant, whoring and gambling. Their outlook on life has only two words: Calculate, they all calculate. What kind of family affection and friendship are worthless to them. They look down on the poor from their bones and always think out of their minds to calculate others, which seems to be their commonality. What flows in their bones is not human blood, but stench venom. Rich people like to make public, so they don’t even know their last name. Because they have money; They are often unreasonable and overbearing. They always let the money in their hands turn Qing officials into corrupt officials and good girls into playthings in their hands. Therefore, they are so hypocritical that they cannot understand. Since I was young, I have lived in a pile of rich people, so I have been somewhat affected by them. The good thing is that I spend most of my time living with my grandmother, who often tells me: people should learn to be kind to others. Therefore, I received two kinds of dual education of different human nature. After finishing high school, I have become two kinds of people. I sympathize with the poor and value the superior life of the rich. When I changed from a girl to a mature woman, when I separated from my family to the society and lived in the poor, I really realized that although the poor are poor, their souls are more noble than those of the rich, full. It should be said that I am closer to the poor, because at this time I am experiencing fraud and play by the rich. At this moment, I really understand the power of power and money, the poor! What they will live forever is that kind of scared and gloomy life. It is real life that makes me understand the different outlook on life of the rich and the poor, and it is also a poor word that makes me understand love and hate clearly. I finally understood my father and my mother’s luxury life. Yes, I want to earn money from the rich like my father, which is really good. My mother is really beautiful and natural and unrestrained. One thing she and her father have in common is to attract the likes of the opposite sex; Mother is more attractive than her father. I often see her coaxing those silly men around. Sometimes I really can’t understand her listening to Grandma: When my mother was young, she was a famous beauty near the Fenhe River, and there were countless people chasing her. It is said that she has many unique skills, no matter what kind of man she dares to communicate with; But anyone who dares to play with her will leave her loud slap on the face. So my mother had an artistic nickname: Wild Rose. I have lived with my grandmother since I was young. How did my father and mother get together? Grandma didn’t want to tell me. Until I finished high school, I was still living with my grandmother. My relationship with my grandmother had already surpassed the affection between me and my parents. Grandma was very kind to me. I stopped asking about anything grandma didn’t want to tell me consciously. Really, I respect my grandmother very much. For parents, home is like a bus station. My mother became a bank employee very early. She was in her forties and changed three times a day, just like a young girl with eternal casting. She is really beautiful, and there are always a group of happy men around her. Ah! It turns out that there are many fools in this world! My God, how old is she? Why are there so many silly men chasing her? The world is really wonderful. My mother’s life has always been luxurious. In my opinion, her so-called friends are just a group of hooligans without cultivation and culture. They hold her and coax her all day long, isn’t it because she is beautiful? They are using money and material to corrode her soul and body. Ah! What a terrible group of demons! What kept me mysterious was that my mother’s life and father turned a blind eye. A man could make his women live with a group of hooligans disguised as Saints all day long, how great is it! I am also a woman. There are also many rich hooligans chasing and coaxing. I know the purpose of them is to make me their plaything. Therefore, I decided my attitude towards life, isn’t it just a play word? Good! Then let’s play. Who is afraid of being a fool? I have been wearing those fashionable clothes my mother didn’t wear since I went to middle school, and my classmates all envy me for those beautiful clothes. Because I am also very beautiful, there are also a group of smelly men who hug before and after. They all coaxed me, let me, and held me. I knew it was because I had a beautiful face and a plump body attracting them. All right! Let them follow! In the gangster circle, I also have several good friends, and sometimes they will give me the conditions to do that. Money, it really makes people’s souls go bad. I was almost conquered by money many times. Maybe it was because I didn’t lack money since I was young, so money didn’t play its due role in front of me. The sisters in the circle were conquered by money, and their beauty was hopeless. But money can’t make me move. I look forward to a sunny man who makes my heart beat like my father. But unfortunately, there was no man like my father who made me move until I graduated from the academy. As a woman, it was a failure to get a man who made me move when I was a girl. After graduating from the academy, I should have guarded four high walls and a group of children, but I was not willing to do nothing like this in my life. For the first time, I broke my grandmother’s wish and left my hometown where Fenshui was gurgling and went to a bustling city where no one knew anyone. I walked into the door of some funny mobile communication unswervingly and became an intern. The system of China Mobile is the exploitation system of capitalism. In order to enter its door, I paid a lot of money, not to mention, without any remuneration, and worked for more than ten hours a day, however, all kinds of unreasonable businesses almost made my newly blooming flower dry and invisible. Tired and tired work, long night, cold and cold north wind, it made me seriously think about my future in this lonely and quiet city. Although I am as beautiful as my mother, I don’t have her ability to coax men. In the bustling S city, I experienced the feeling of loneliness and helplessness for the first time in my life. The only man who supported me was a man several years older than me. His name was Liu Er. He is a man without many cultures, and it is Liu Er, who has not many cultures, who entered my spiritual life. I remember the day when I first met him, he appeared in front of me with a smirk in his oily clothes. He knew he was a repairman without introducing Xing. Because it was the introduction of my classmates, I had to accept him on the surface. What I didn’t expect was that it was this old man who filled my psychological emptiness. He said to me: he loved me, and I was absolutely surprised at that time. My mother, do I really want to put this flower on cow dung? He is really as handsome as my father. Therefore, I love the default that he said! We left a phone call after the party. We tried to get along with each other and spent the long depressed time on the phone in the last season of the cold wind roaring in 2010, liu Er seems to be like all men with low-level ideas, who cannot get rid of the demand for sex. He proposed many times to come to S city to live with me. I thought his desire was simply shameless; So I refused him. The reason is very simple. He and I are not the same person at all. According to my heart, as a woman in the early stage of youth, why don’t I want that kind of thing? But I knew in my heart that he was a man who could do that with any woman at will. The reason why I keep in touch with him is just to listen to the local voice and learn more about the changes of my hometown; Let the empty experience fill in. What is he and I? At best, it is just a friend who can chat. Frankly speaking, the person I want to dedicate to must be a man that makes me move. He never made me move for him, so he didn’t have this qualification. However, Liu Er still came, facing Liu Er’s arrival, I avoided. Late winter S city! The cold wind was still roaring recklessly. Lonely, I braved the biting cold wind and wandered around the city aimlessly. I am looking forward to the man who makes me move, and where is this man who makes me move? The cold wind still dances wildly, and I am still in ramble. How dare I go back to my rental house? Let alone face this wishful thinking Liu Er. Suddenly, there was a middle-aged man guarding his book stall on the side of the busy road. From a distance, he looked so handsome, just when I looked at him, I found that he was also casting his eyes on me from time to time. Ah! When his eyes met my eyes again, my whole body was like 1 kW electric current shuttling; My heart was suddenly vibrated by him for the first time, my heart was beating, but my feet walked towards him involuntarily. He sucked me tightly to his side like a magnet. I couldn’t help approaching his book stall, he looked at me intently again. He didn’t say a word to me. His eyes were very friendly; He stared at me for so long. Ah! What kind of man is he that can draw my heart and body to his side? I never knew him. Why did my heart beat faster when I saw him involuntarily? Is he the man I have been looking forward? I think, no, I didn’t mean to read, but the man in front of me who made me feel excited all the time, his tolerance had to make me careerism, and the vanity of pursuing perfection revived again. Although he didn’t say anything, he kept looking at me with his eyes that seemed to be talking, and I seemed to read his heart from his talking eyes; he seemed to have seen through my inner world at this time. The power of his eyes caught me, and I was finally captured by the charm of this man. The North Wind of late winter has already rolled the wandering people back to every alley. He still doesn’t talk to me; I can’t control myself. I said: Boss, do you rent a book? He shook his head, so he had no interest in renting books. I am a little unconvinced, boss, how do you sell this book? He finally spoke, not thinking that he had a standard and pleasant Southern accent. Girls and books are very cheap, you can choose whatever you want.

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